How To Handle Wedding Planning Stress – Bride Guide

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Comin’ in hot! Our Bride Guide series chat this week is all about how to handle the stress of planning a wedding. With a task list as long as CVS receipts it can all be so overwhelming. I want to share with you the way I broke it all down for myself since we did the planning ourselves and how I managed the Bridezilla-ness of it all.

Lists on lists baby! There’s a timeline of events, there’s the EVENT, and there’s all the planning in between. So today we’ll talk about the things that go in between the engagement and the HONEYMOON <3

Honestly, typing out hashtag was so fun for me because umm what world do we live in that creating a hashtag has become one of our wedding priorities! Ours was #exoticnationwedding LOL Do the damn thing is pretty high up there though, all of this to say you’re getting married and it’s going to be the BEST time of your life!

So go through this list, fill it out for yourself and see where you are. Decide the big things like budget and who, where, when NOW, and the rest of the list we can get to. Do you like how informal my speaking is… “no stress baby just think about the W’s” (who what when where) HAHA

Get inspired! Pinterest is your new BFF! And your BFF is the MOH! I loved rose gold, romantic decorations, corals, and royal blue! The DIY part is next week, this week I just want you to focus on the answers you gave last week and the list you’re making this week.

I have so many recommendations for THE dress, invitation sites, how to map out the seating chart, and the best way to go about the cake/favors/and decoration details. Check out BHLDN, get on Pinterest, start putting together what size wedding you’re having so that all of the other details come together much easier for you, and create that task list… starting here.

I really hope all this list creating helps to get all of the stress out of your head and onto paper so that you have a starting point and a clear idea of what your next steps are. Knowing what’s next really does help to keep the stress at bay, what’s scary is the unknowing part and the ‘do I have time to do all this planning’ part. But with a clear plan you’re breaking it all down into ONE thing at a time and it’s much more manageable.

What shall we talk about next week? What to DIY? What to skimp on what not to? Where you should apply your budget? How to make everyone happy when this is YOUR day and you’re just trying not to go crazy? Tell me <3

 

 

 

 

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Bride Guide: My Top Tips For Planning

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It’s wedding season! The warm summer months, breezy beautiful evenings, it’s the most coveted time of year to plan a wedding, bridal shower, and bachelorette party. With this Bride Guide I’ve got you covered and over the next few weeks I’ll go into detail about what’s necessary, what’s not, and what’s just fun FUNS- the best part! This is my favorite series that I’ve ever launched and starting today, we’ll begin with the basics.

First thing’s first, if you’re wedding is in less than 6 months away… BOOK YOUR VENUE! Start looking now, book it and let that first big thing v important thing, be taken care of so you can focus on the fun stuff like your dress, the party, the food, the people…did I mention the party?

So congratulations on your engagement and I’m happy you’re here! My mission is to help you stay far far away from Bridezillaville <3

 

Thought starters:

  • who, what, when, where, how- the who is easy: you and your fiance´, the intimate or larger than life wedding is the what, so now it’s all about prep and plan! The how will come, first answer some of these questions
  • what’s our budget- is this a DIY wedding or a ‘spare no expense’ kind of wedding, will it be small and intimate, or will everyone and their mother be there? Is there a wedding planner or are you it?
  • location location location – venue for the vows and the reception, church or other space to exchange vows and then a separate location for the reception? Multiple locations? Outdoor? Indoor? Destination?
  • details- catering, open bar (for the love of love please do an open bar), cake/cupcakes/pies/dessert table, favors, decorations, flowers, seating charts, all that we’ll go into in my next Bride Guide article
  • the most fun part- THE DRESS, is there a party dress, the groom/bride/partner, the bridal party, hair, makeup, accessories, bridal shower, bachelorette/bachelor parties, all the things that make this season so fun, so memorable, so worth every penny-every tear-every argument-every frustration

So now that you’re thinking about these things, lets break it down even further for next time and do me a favor and leave me a comment or DM on Instagram and tell me all the topics that you want to hear about. All the things you want me to go into detail over, I’ve got you!

Congratulations! I’m so excited for you and I cannot wait to share more of this Bride Guide series with you <333

 

 

 

How To Change Your Name – The Things They Didn’t Tell You

by with No Comment bridallifestyleweddingwedding planning

There’s so much about weddings and getting married that no one tells you about. Sounds like some crazy wedding planner scheme BS but it’s true! I’ve explained a bit of it in previous posts, and now, after having planned and experienced the most perfect wedding day of my life- I’m on to the changing my name part of it all. Oh, change your name they said, it’ll be easy they said. Well they lied dammit.

Let me tell you a story. So like many unknowing and slightly lazy people, I went with an assisted name change service and purchased the Platinum package from Hitch Switch. It’s a service that (I was hoping) helps you change your name by providing you with all of the paperwork and forms needed and removing the fuss from the entire process. Depending on the level of service you purchase (from $29-$89) they will send you the paperwork and even fill it out for you if you pay for it. The Platinum package gives you all of the forms automatically filled out, provides you with pre addressed envelopes, and a passport service. However, NONE of this is impossible for you to do on your own. So save your money and let me tell you how to change your name. For free. And PS you have to go into certain government offices in person, and no name change service can save you from having to do that, so . . .


YOUR SOCIAL SECURITY CARD
Social Security office: do this FIRST. Go to your local social security office and if you go early you’ll be in and out of there pretty painlessly. You have to take care of your social security card first because this particular process will need to be completed 48 hours before any other documentation is submitted to any other government office. Bring to your local Social Security office:

a) a completed SS-5 Form (don’t forget to sign your new married name)
b) provide the original or certified copy of your Marriage Certificate
c) proof of identity (your driver’s license, state issued ID card, or US Passport)

They’ll give you a receipt (mine cost me $0.00) and notice that you’ll receive your new social security card within 2 weeks. Mine came in after 2 business days.

YOUR DRIVER’S LICENSE
DMV: this is next in the process, go early! If you don’t have an appointment I suggest you go at least 30 minutes before your local DMV office opens and wait in line. I got to ours at 7am and by 8am when the doors opened I was 17th in line! You’ll need to bring:

a) the original or a certified copy of your marriage certificate
b) your old driver’s license (you’ll be taking a new photo so come camera ready 😉
c) 2 proof of residency documents (CA doesn’t need this verification)
d) a completed DL 44 form which they’ll provide for you at the DMV as original signatures are required on the form.
* on the DL 44 form: don’t forget to sign your married name at the bottom, check mark the “have you ever applied for a DL under a different name”, and list your maiden name next to it.


YOUR PASSPORT
We’re going to Bali for two weeks for our honeymoon and I learned that if you’re traveling abroad you’ve got to give yourself plenty of time to have your Passport sent in and your new one sent back to you. Expedited processing may be your best bet if you have less than a month before you depart. Pro tip: when you change your name your Passport number changes. So when you book your flight either use your new married name with your old Passport number and then call the airline to correct it once your new one arrives, OR wait to change your name until after you’ve traveled as it becomes a headache to correct once you’ve entered in all of the information.

a) complete the DS 82 Form *sign your new married name
b) attach a Passport photo to the left of Section 10 in the designated box. Hitch Switch’s provided photo service took longer than expected so I personally suggest going to Costco, Walgreens, or another retailer that is in compliance with government Passport photo requirements.
c) submit the DS 82 form with your new photo attached along with your current Passport, the original or certified copy of your marriage certificate, and a check or money order made out to ‘US Department of State’. For $110 if you’re going with standard processing (4-6 weeks) or for $170 for expedited processing (3 weeks).
d) you’ll want to get tracking on this just because it holds your original passport and marriage certificate. In most cases it’ll be free or there may be a $5.95 fee – totes worth it.

For Standard Processing:
National Passport Processing Center
P.O. BOX 640155
Irving, TX 75064-0155

For Expedited Processing:
National Passport Processing Center
P.O. BOX 90955
Philadelphia, PA 19190-0955

 

The rest of it like your banking, credit cards, businesses, work stuff etc will work themselves out. Honestly, I haven’t even gotten to that part yet BUT these initial steps will help you get your name changed and save you some money. I’m so upset with myself for paying for a service that I could have easily done myself had I just done a lil research. You’ll be paying for them to print up the paperwork, fill it out for you, and send you a few pre paid envelopes. Save yo money honey.

Are you changing your name? Have you looked into name changing services or the paperwork needed to do so? 

 

 

 

 

 

YOU’RE GETTING MARRIED! NOW WHAT?! – BRIDE GUIDE

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YOU’RE GETTING MARRIED!!! I’m getting married too yayyy ! So now what do we do?!

Get married they said, it’ll be fun they said. Except, they forgot to say that there’s a lot of planning and unneccessary details that go into your wedding. And it IS fun, but what’s up with all these RULES! Who made up things like, wedding favors, a wedding theme, oh and do you know the color of your linens?! OH OH and will you need chafing sets?! Ummm what? I just want to wear a pretty dress and say I do to my best friend in front of everyone we love.

So incase you too are going through all of the details of wedding planning, here’s a little bride guide from me to you, as I navigate through all of this with you. From sorting out the to-do list, to prioritizing the following umpteen things that must get done. So deep breaths my pretty, here we go!

1. Create a website or landing page for your guests – we’re using Weebly but there are a ton of other web hosting sites, we just love that this one is FREE! This is a great place to put who, what, when, where, and how to get there for all of your friends and family members. Include accommodations (if you block out rooms they’ll get a discounted rate), shuttle or bus information if there’s any, schedule of events, where you’re registered for gifts, and a deadline for their RSVP


2. Send out Save The Dates – this part doesn’t make any sense to me. You’re sending guests a Save The Date WITH your wedding date on it, but then they need a formal invitation also . . . the rules part. We sent out Paperless Post save the dates and on them we included our wedding website and asked our guests to RSVP that way.  I purchased ‘coins’ and sent it out after importing all of my guest’s emails- made it so easy! There’s also Evite and other places that you can send online invitations through. If you choose to have them printed, Minted and Paper Divas are great I’ve heard and won’t cost your first born!

3. Location, Venue, Food – oh and the DJ, centerpieces, wedding gown and accessories, bouquet, and other big ticket items to sort out. Once you’ve chosen your venue and location, set a day and time and get to planning baby! Don’t forget to ask your venue if they provide tables, chairs, linens, and a set up/ break down crew. Food options, open bar, centerpiece arrangements, and cake cutting fees are also some things you’ll want to confirm with your venue. If you get a ‘day of wedding coordinator’ than they’ll make sure you’re standing where you should be when you should be *ie when you’re dancing with your girls, champs in hand and it’s cake cutting time*. Otherwise, do what we’re doing and have your DJ keep the timeline.


4. Pictures, flowers, and things that get lost in the shuffle – like ordering wedding favors, picking out a cake topper, and making sure you order 2 sets of garters (one for throwing and one for a keepsake). All of these things you’ll get to as you go down your list of To Do’s but some things that could help you stay within budget are to DIY some easy things, and to research the hell out of everything.

  • see if you can drop off vases and containers to your florist and just pay them to fill them with your floral arrangement choices. They’ll usually also credit you for this since they won’t need to use their own vessels
  • shop around for shoes, accessories, gifts, and your veil. I ordered my veil from Melinda Rose Design (who also specializes in headpieces!) and she’ll send you samples of the veils so you can color match with your wedding gown. Pretty brilliant and for a fraction of what A LOT of veils will cost you. I love the ‘try before you buy’ option that she offers
  • search sites like Luna Bazaar and Oriental Trading to order centerpieces, gift boxes, etc. They’re very reasonably priced and I guarantee whatever your shabby chic heart desires, they WILL have
  • delegate responsibilities to your bridal shower, see above photo 😀 (and here’s fun ways to ask your best girls to be a part of your big day). They’re there to help you and to make sure your most special day goes as smoothly and stress free as possible. No one wants to be around bridezilla! LOL So recruit the help where you can
  • if you’re planning your wedding in another city/ state/ country, it does help to create a mock table on your living room floor to get an idea of 1) how many people you want sitting at each table 2) how many pieces you’d like to have as your centerpiece 3) if you’re having favors and if you’ll place them at the table with your guests or not . . . Joe came home to see this (below photo) had taken over our living room and I was SERIOUS about picking out those damn centerpieces! haha

5. SET A BUDGET – okay okay this prolly should’ve been the #1 thing to do but honestly, we went over budget just in planning where we’re having our wedding so there’s that. Budgeting out your expenses does help to wrangle your ideas and keep priorities in order. If you go over on your dress than maybe order your shoes from DSW instead of Christian Louboutin 😉

At the end of the day, it’s going to be THE most special day and the love your life will be standing beside you, in the presence of everyone you love. None of those little details and stressors will matter, I promise. So just enjoy the magic of planning it all, take time to reassess what you want over what you need, and everything else is just decoration (thank you Pilar for that one!).

There are a ton of other tips and tricks I’d love to share with you but I’ll put them all together in another post, so stay tuned <3 I really hope these #JessBrideGuide posts and videos are helping you.

 

Have you used any of these resources already? Are there any other tips you have to share with us brides to be? Thank you in advance for the help! 

 

 

 

HOW TO SITE VISIT FOR A DESTINATION WEDDING – BRIDE GUIDE

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The ONE YEAR countdown has begun! Planning is in full force over here, and this Saturday Joe, Corinne, and I head to Azul Beach for our very FIRST ever site visit! Cheers for our destination wedding! So today as part of my Bride Guide, I wanted to share with you some things I learned about destination weddings, site visits, and one of the destinations we decided on!

Ever since we decided on a destination wedding, we knew it would require travel for our guests and lots of planning. We wanted to give our loved ones a year to plan and prep, so accommodations, flights, food, and transportation were all on our “lets try and make this a doable thing for people”. I’m also keeping in mind that this is our dream wedding and a ‘tour’ wedding- so there will be two ceremonies, both very small and intimate.

Some things to do and ask when looking for your perfect destination:

  • what time of year do you want your wedding and what’s your dream destination
  • schedule site visits in that location with various hotels and venues so that you can actually see what that property looks like and have options. They can do a lot of things with a fish eye lens and photoshop!
  • do you have a guest list? If not, create one so you have a general idea of how many people are coming and how many rooms/accommodations you will require and what dinner plans will be
  • how’s the weather in the location at the time you plan on having your wedding there? Research other people’s experiences and do lots of fact checking on your venue from people who’ve been there. This is huge.
  • do you have a budget? This can be a deciding factor when it comes to destinations, you’ll know right away what’s realistic and what isn’t. Oh you mean I CAN’T get married in Iceland?! mkkayy
  • ask for wedding packages and rates before making a decision so you know what’s included in said price and what you’ll be paying extra for

Having gone through the list of questions to ask venues, doing a ton of location dreaming, and hours of researching, we decided that we want to get married in Mexico! Near Tulum in a breathtaking, beachy, dreamy kind of intimate ceremony!

Wowzer, I did a lot of googling, emailing, and phone conversations to narrow our search down. Joe and I went over timing, budget, guest list, and what we want, and we finally locked in a potential location! We’re all set to site visit this weekend at … drum roll please … Azul Beach by Karisma Hotels and Resorts! And THIS will be the view from our room!!!


I have to tell ya, this was NOT an easy decision, literally every property in Tulum and Playa Del Carmen is stunning and we wanted to be able to visit them all! But after getting all of the answers we needed in terms of wedding packages, what’s included, AND that this is an all-inclusive hotel, we were all in.

We actually get to see one of the beautiful ceremonial package in person this weekend which includes our wedding colors (earth tones, blushy pastels, and pops of color) <— sounds like every color imaginable right? lol but it also comes with a bouquet, welcoming drinks, dinner reception, and dancing among other things! I’m sure we’ll have more questions once we get there and sit down with our coordinator, but I’m just so excited to see it!

Karisma offers a bridal dress rehearsal where you get to see your wedding package choice and try the food that will be served at your wedding! Ummm can we say cake?!?!?! That’s another thing, when you ask for your package pricing, see what extras (though a wedding cake to me is a must) it comes with and what it doesn’t. You don’t want to get there and realize there is no DJ and no cake.

Literally all I want my guests to remember is the drinks, the dancing, and the love <333 The food and the location will be amazing but really, who remembers how pretty the napkins were or how extravagant the centerpieces were? No, people will be so happy to be celebrating your special day with you that it won’t matter to them if they have metallic gold-flaked napkins or paper mache ones!

Even though this is a trip for us to see the venue in person, experience the food and service before our big day, and see our set up come to life . . . it’s also a VACATION! I cannot wait to be horse bike riding and swimming in a cenote at El Dorado Royale! It’s a property also by Karisma and a location close to where we’ll be staying. So you can expect a full vlog video up on my channel when we get back because, ‘go-pro footage or it didn’t happen’ 😀 Follow us along on Instagram with #KarismaExperience and #LomasTravel!!!

Wedding planning can be overwhelming, I know I’m overwhelmed by every detail that comes with it. There are things I didn’t even think about before, I mean there should be a book about it! But also I have to remember that this isn’t stressful- I’m planning the best day ever with the love of my life, so why stress. I hope this helps you if you’re planning a destination wedding any time soon or know  someone who is!

Do you have any other tips for me or other brides to be?! Please share <333

 

 

 

BRIDE GUIDE: TOP 5 WEDDING PLAN TIPS!

by with 7 Comments bachelorette partybridalDIYget the lookgift ideasinspirationlifestyleparty planningpersonalspecial occassionstips and trickswedding planning

I’m so excited to share this series with you and I’m also creating videos for it on my YouTube channel! Welcome to the Bride Guide, from yours truly! Because, those that can’t do, teach and I’ll be the first to admit that I suck at planning! Like really I’d rather have someone else just tell me where to be and when ha! Realistically though I’m a control FREAK so I’m giving you my tips and tricks to staying bright and breathing and never turning into the huffing puffing bridezilla, from the control freak in me to the control freak in you!

So the part of wedding planning that I found to be the most stress inducing (ahem the entire ‘planning’ part of it duh) has become the most fun to do … once I relied on other sources to do it for me of course! Today I’m sharing with you my bride guide to planning your big day with ease, featuring some of the sites I’m currently using to prep, plan, style, and SAVE with my top 5 wedding planning tips!


1. Create a site– a landing page for guests and a place to get information surrounding your wedding. If I have a ton of questions I can’t imagine the questions my guests would have and creating a site for this puts it onto one place- the who, the where, the what, the when, the hows! You’ve probably heard of Martha Stewart weddings and The Knot, and I love checking in on those sites to see if I’m on track with the planning ‘time line’ (oh yeah, there’s a freaking time line to follow! No pressure!), but I’m using RileyGrey.com for my actual wedding site and reception hub. It feels daunting but it’s super user friendly and if I can navigate it, your tortoise probably can too! You design the page, you fill in the information, create your own personalized link, and boom, you’re like a pro baby!

2. Set a date and pick a location– I feel like these two go hand in hand because if you plan on a destination wedding *raises hands and feet* than timing becomes crucial depending on time of year, weather conditions, and travel. Also, when you set a date the next natural thing to do is pick your location which takes away 99.9% of stress, at least for me it did. I’m living and breathing by THIS blog by JetFete which caters to destination wedding planning, and helps you narrow down your options, sift through all the possibilities, and goes through every question you may have lingering when it comes to planning a wedding away from home.

3. Food, flowers, and such– choosing a vendor that offers prime location, handles decorating for you, and provides food AND beverage service is like a dream come true! But lets face it, most vendors aren’t all inclusive, thus you’re left to fend for yourself. I got your back though, CaratsAndCake is a site that allows you to shop your vendors ACCORDING TO LOCATION (whoa! and hence pick your location first) with the help of other brides who’ve already had their weddings and link you out to each of the services they used. Genius right?!?!?! So you go through the albums, it features photos from their wedding and the links to their vendors from food, to their dress, to decorations and flowers! These links are located at the bottom of the post which takes you to a page with other work the company has done, and from there you can contact the vendor directly.
G E N I U S

4. Take photos and send Save The Dates!– taking lovey dovey pictures are the fun part! You get to look all kissy and fishy faced with the love of your life … in front of strangers, and hold poses that seem awkward but look sexy! Then you send those to your family and friends as Save The Dates and RSVP cards 😀 Postable is like oxygen to me right now because it gathers the mailing address and contact information from all of your guests and puts them into one place for you. So when you’re ready to mail out your invitations simply upload or export that information to your stationary person or print them off yourself and you’re set! It’s a free service and you create a personalized link which you then email your guests with. It takes them to the landing page where they fill out their information and it goes directly to you, never shared (that was a big deal for me). You could use this for holidays, special occasions, and birthdays since you update the list yourself throughout the year.

5. Register and receive– gifts! The super duper fun funners part! Well it’s all fun but I mean c’mon, wahooo gifts!!! Sites like The Knot, Honey Fund, and others also allow your nearest and dearest to either purchase a gift from your registry or contribute to your honeymoon. Since I will both register for gifts AND ask for honeymoon perks, I’m using NewlyWish. With group gifting options and a low cash fund fee, it was just the way to go for us. I also never know what I need or want- I want it all, but this site helps you skim through products and add them to your list with a click of a button . . . ummm yes please!

So I realllllly hope this post helped you if you’re planning a wedding, helping someone else plan theirs, or will be planning in the future! There are so many resources out there like Etsy and Pinterest that give you a plethora of options when it comes to story boards and sharing ideas, and gift giving! However these are the sites I’m currently using to organize my thoughts and plans for my own wedding and I wanted to share them with you before things start to get cray lol.

There are some key things left out of this article like dress shopping and timelines, which will be woven in between all of this, but these were the items that I needed to check off my list in order to settle the nerves and be able to function and get shit done in my life so there ya go! And cheers to you <333

Are there any sites or companies you use for planning a wedding or special occasion?