I grew up with three dads. It’s a beautiful story and I love all my dads, they each play a different role in my life. The daddio who raised me was my Drill Sergeant dad. He raised us on tough love and discipline, we were like little soldiers with chores and rules, and we lived on military bases for most of my life- you get the picture.
I didn’t know this until I was much older, but there were a lot of lessons there in the things he’d say to us. LOL the story of everyone’s childhood eh? So I looked up the literal definition of, “suck it up” because it was something I’d hear on the daily. It read: Accept a hardship
Suck it up Miss Priss he’d say
My dad used to tell my siblings and I to suck it up and I was referred to as, ‘Miss Priss’. I was girly and I loved raiding my mom’s makeup bag and wearing her jewelry. I’d prance around in her stilettos before I even knew how to walk properly in them, and my sister and I would have fashion shows- we’d even dress up my brother! I thought I was a Princess. Some things never change 😉
I’m the oldest of three and I’d think to myself, ‘why do I have to be tough like my brother and why do I have to be in charge of everyone?’. I’d get into a lot of trouble if my brother or sister got into trouble so we looked out for one another, we were the three best friends that anyone’s ever had. And I’ve taken that phrase and have said it out loud to my self, I’ve said it to my daughter, I’ve even said it to my puppers when they look at their kibble like ‘wtf’. I was taught to be tough so I thought everyone else should be too. It’s the way I parented.
to accept something is to give it consent
I don’t necessarily consent to anything in life that has sharpened my edges. But I’ve learned from all of them, I’ve let some of that shit go (literally balled those moments up in my fist and dropped em out my window, and onto the freeway), and moved on from anything that didn’t grow me. I used to resent it when I was told to suck it up, it made me feel like I wasn’t given permission to hurt or feel. But it wasn’t that at all, I just wasn’t given permission to whine about it. “Why waste your energy on something out of your control?”… ummm couldn’t my dad have just said that? I was and I am allowed to hurt, to feel, and to be emotional. I just won’t whine about it…Â for long any way.
We don’t have to accept anything. But we can use things that would usually bid resistance and instead apply them to be the driving force behind what keeps us moving. Think of it like this: we are in control . . . of nothing. How we react is everything and if we can just take all the bullshit, all the wrenches that get thrown in our (very overly controlled) plans, the interactions with mean people and all the suck-ass situations in life, and if we can just “suck it up” for a moment- I’ve realized that there’s more that’ll keep you going than there are things that’ll knock you down baby.
I’m grateful for never being saved
When no one comes to save you, you become fully aware that you don’t need anyone to save you. You understand clearly that you can save your gahtdamn self. And I did. And you will. And you have. Read that again <3
Can you think of moments in your life where you actually saved your own ass from something and thought, “f*ck, I’ve totally got this.”? Click through to see the sweetest best friends that anyone’s ever had <3