Well that’s an attractive photo! We’re friends, I can tell you that I consider myself to be a pretty sweaty person and thankfully I’m not smelly … I don’ think. You’d tell me right? Sweaty like if I get nervous or excited or move around too much, all sweaty situations for me. And I’ve been using all natural deodorants for a little over a year now with the nudging of Corrine, “mom, you’re clogging your pores”. Yes Corriney, we’re supposed to sweat, I read all about it.
Sweating is a part of our body’s natural detox system, that sweet sweet sweat! It’s the stinky part that I’m not on board with SO I tried about 7 different all natural deodorants over the coarse of a year and these were my findings, let us reveal the armpit!
Things to remember:
a) be patient. It may take your body a few days to acclimate to an all natural formula which usually contains an oil, a fragrance, and a bacteria killing agent that causes the odor. Also your body is ridding itself of toxins so you may even smell worse, it’s normal. So perhaps give it a week or two before you decide you’re over it
b) the sweating part doesn’t stop. It’s a deodorant not an antiperspirant so don’t be alarmed when your pits feel more moist than usual … ugh that word
c) every body is different. One formula that works for me may not work for you so don’t give up
Do you use an all natural deodorant? What’s worked for you? Share what’s worked so we can all give them a try and eliminate the ones that haven’t worked and try other ones <3 Cheers to that sweet sweet sweat baby, and not being smelly. Which doesn’t mean you won’t have moist pits … ugh that word
Oh man, starting today off with a big question for myself and feeling cheesy about it … insert my favorite emoji here which is the cute lil monkey covering it’s face … it me! Confidence, what is it to me, and is it on sale at Trader Joe’s. Without being too woo woo here, defining confidence and then trying to tap into that and emit it in a way that is so bright and sparkly that no one can take it away, well that’s been a thing.
I think that confidence is a state of mind and I think people like to box me in. They put me into this box of what they think they know I am and then they’re surprised when I’m not that. Am I the only one, or do you think that’s true of you where people assume you’re one thing but really you’re many things? I can see sometimes that people think I’m bright and bubbly all the time, I mean I try to be, I love being a bright ass Lite-Brite (remember those?) but I’m human and I have crap days too. And I have things happen to me that hurt me and let me down too, and then some days things that’ve happened to me in the past sneak up on me and say HELLO YOU CAN’T IGNORE ME ANYMORE. Then I either one, get really great with my forcefield shield, or two I’ll stare it in the face and ask it what it wants. But I think people really think I don’t have bad days because I don’t talk about them, maybe I should start and share my coping skills. If it helps you to get push through the rough stuff, here it is.
Sometimes I feel like I’m my own therapist but really we all need a lil therapy so. Confidence is also a form of coping I think, we all cope with some deep rooted stuff that can really affect us whether or not we understand how damaged we are from our pasts or whatever is happening in our lives. And what gets me through is what I say to myself in my head (and sometimes out loud) which is that, no matter how tough it may be at that moment, 1) I’ve been through worse 2) the sun will come up tomorrow and be bright and shiny and saturate the world with all its happiness whether I like it or not and 3) I’m the only one who actually gets to decide what my life is. If it’s good it’s because I make it good, if it sucks ass it’s because I allow it to suck ass and I’m content with mediocre. And some days, honestly, I’m content with mediocre. Some days ya just gotta feeeel. Most days though, nope and nope.
If you see me smiling when I don’t want to smile it’s because I don’t like feeling sad and I feel sad a lot, it’s normal. That feeling can rush me out of no where and for no reason. Umm hello universe, can you take that energy and put it somewhere else, I’m down with The Secret so why the resistance. Sometimes I play in the mud but most days I swim in it just long enough to realize what it is that’s bothering me and why. Like is it an emotion or a thought, or is it a thought that I turned into an emotion? Most days after swimming in the muck though, it feels heavy, it weighs me down, and it’s just mooky… so I wash that shit off, smile because I can, and then I do a lil self care to change my attitude. Honestly, some days my chest feels so heavy with anxiety that it hurts to breathe, but it’s a reminder that I’m breathing, and if there’s breath left in my body I’ll fight because I’m a fucking fighter. And so are you.
I know I can get all woo woo on you but it helps me to share how I cope, it helps me to be transparent about emotions and seasons in life because that’s real to me and baby if it doesn’t feel real I don’t want it. That’s some kind of country song I just know it. If you know the song leave it below so I can give it another listen 😉
P.S. self care, therapy, medication, detoxing, all good things if you need it. And only you know what you need, don’t let society shame you for taking care of you. If you can’t take care of you then you can’t help take care of someone else and my number one secret to being Corrine’s mom is that I stay sane at all times. Sometimes that means I pop on here and ramble and sometimes that means I pop a bottle of champs and cheers my damn self.
You feel me on any of this? I think I moved away from confidence a bit, but again it’s a head space for me. Tell me about you.
I take this topic literally and metaphorically, I mean if you watch any of my Instagram stories you’ve seen that I don a hat about 90% of the time. Hats help with my bad hair days, dirty hair days, and days I want to feel good without having to do anything with my hair at all. I promise this isn’t a post about all the hats I own. It wouldn’t be very long, think picture book and nothing but paper boy hats. This is about all the hats that I wear.
We all wear so many hats don’t we? We work, we go to school, we parent, we adult, we make lists, we Marie Kondo our lives, we do it all, and we stresss! Oh man, do we stress. That’s why I think it’s so important that we find time to re-center our energy and connect to things that we’re passionate about without the attachment to another person. It allows us to be an individual which can be difficult when we’re so busy being all the things for everyone else. I read somewhere (let me know where if you recognize this) but that ‘it’s not time that we’re limited on, time is infinite, it’s our energy and we must protect our energy, and give it away and put it into the people and things we most care about.’ It went something like that.
Joe and I both work from home now and working for ourselves we’ve known this much to be true about ourselves: we don’t clock in or out so we’re basically working from the time we wake up until the time we go to sleep, we don’t take lunch breaks where we go somewhere and step away from it all, and it’s all we talk about on date nights since it IS our life. Like, what do other people talk about on date night, I need to know. Oh and we go crazy! Trying not to lose it, here are five things I’ve been doing to stay on track so that I have time to complete my task list but also not fall off my rocker plowing through the day.
don’t hit snooze – oh I’ve done it before, on days that I truly need more rest and body can’t get up, I rest. Snooze away! But on most days the alarm goes off and I pop out of bed. I’ve found that it helps me personally to get up and get am ’em with no hesitation. You really have to listen to your body, if you need the rest do it, but if you don’t try jumping out of, really jump out of bed and see how you feel HA
morning routine – this is important for me, kind of sets the tone for the day and I’m a creature of habit so for my own brain’s sake I’ll meditate, read, dance around with music, stare blankly at a wall with no thoughts at all…. no really I’ve done that before and I consider it my form of mediation. Anything really that clears my head of clutter or negativity. Having my coffee on the couch with my diffuser going is part of my morning ritual
work out – again, for me personally it really helps my energy levels and my attitude to get some adrenaline going first thing in the morning. A nice sweat sesh allows me to start the day explosively and kind of keeps me at that high for the entire day. On my rest days I’ll use this time to stretch and on some days an evening workout is just how it goes. This isn’t for everyone but I believe that if I can take care of myself and I’m healthy and strong that I can take care of my loved ones
realistic expectations – this is really hard for a control freak like myself. I’ll write lists for my lists and then be disappointed when something isn’t crossed off. So I’ve learned to write down 5 things each day and prioritize something I’ve been dreading as my NUMBER ONE thing to get done. Have you ever felt accomplished after doing that one thing you didn’t want to do, well lead with that dread daily … you know what I’m sayin 😉 It’s always so much more painful to put it off than to just get errrr done
I do my best and my best is good enough – can’t you just see me repeating that to myself every day? … “all work and no play makes jack a dull boy” LOL But truly, I’ve had to learn (still learning tbh) that if I’m giving it my all, and I’m truly putting in my best, well then if something didn’t get done that’s okay
Remember, we all have the same amount of hours in the day as Oprah. No pressure self, you’ve got this. Also self, go outside and talk to people, you can become a hermit at times. And p.s. i love you
What are some thing you do daily to balance all the hat wearing that you’re doing??? Are you a bullet journaler? Do you Marie Kondo all your friends and family’s things? Do you struggle with balancing it all out? You’ve got this <3
I don’t know about you but new beginnings can be anxiety inducing for me. Even though I’m all about fresh starts, setting intentions, and being motivated, I’m not inclined to reinvent myself completely or create resolutions that feel frustrating. I feel like my 2019 got a slow start because I was really enjoying the slower pace of things and spending time with my family and friends, but full disclosure- reading about and looking at everyone else’s goal setting skills made me feel like I needed to aim higher. Like how much higher could I have aimed, I’m taking a career leap this year so I felt like I was all good in the goal setting department. But social media has the power to make us feel like we’re not good enough sometimes so here’s to a new year and same me, but improved… well, improvinggg.
Each year Joe, myself, and our friend Miya get together in January and make vision boards together and set intentions for our year. I like using the word ‘intentions’ over ‘resolutions’ because in my mind’s eye leading from an intention every day (instead of a solid ‘must do’) make big goals feel attainable. When you resolve to do something you’re firmly making the decision to do it, I googled that. So what happens when you don’t complete that thing, or when you don’t quite reach that goal? A natural reaction is to feel like a failure because most often times we don’t give ourselves the grace to be a work in progress, perfection sounds pretty but not fun. That’s why I love setting intentions, I give myself room to be human. Life happens man, we just can’t get caught in the quick sand and just try to be better the next day.
What you’ll need for a vision board aka intention setting seshy:
poster board (dollar store baby!)
magazines (you don’t necessarily need a bunch, 1-3 is plenty, promise)
scissors (unless you like to rip things)
glue stick (tape takes long and glue sticks just glide on easily and stick right away)
P.S. you don’t specifically need these things, a piece of paper with words you write on them will suffice. It’s not about what you make it with, it’s about what makes it up. Damn, she’s yoda.
So think about your goals, your intentions, what words you want to say to yourself daily, what photos ignite enthusiasm within yourself to go after that thing you want to receive or achieve. That’s what matters. Cut out those words, those images, write down those things, add to them quarterly, take away the things that don’t serve you, there’s just no right or wrong way to do this.
The first year we ever made vision boards we had two magazines and rubber cement. You can do this with anything and I hope you do <3
MY INTENTIONS FOR THIS YEAR:
Personally:
read more. I read two books last year. TWO… that’s terrible
balance work time with family time. with me time. with friend time. That’s a lot of balancing
create a nighttime routine and stick to it. No phone after 7pm? Read for an hour before bed? Meditate? Sure, those sound nice
move. I need a bigger space that we can create a specific work space in. Joe and I both work from home so we need to be able to separate the two so we don’t kill each other
save for a house. Or more travel, either would make me happy. We saved last year for goals and financial freedom and I’d like to triple that
Professionally:
get certified. I’ve been studying (v slowly, I don’t like studying) to get my personal training license. A lot of things are happening this year that I’ve never been more thrilled or terrified about. Means I’m on the right path
complete my e book. Did you know I’ve been trying to complete my e book for a year now? lol I need to paste a photo of a book to my vision board!
blog and youtube more consistently. I have a hard time with schedules, I’m working on that
build a team. This is a big one for me because I’m so used to wearing all the hats, to doing all the things. It’s time I build a team who can help me grow and inspire me to create
What are some intentions you’ll set for yourself this year? We got this <3
With each new year I take some time to reflect on the things I’ve done, the places I’ve been, and what I’ve learned. This story is inspired by my friend Karissa. I want to give you a brief history of some significant relationships in my life that I’ve had with women and with men, which were all important to me so here goes.
Also, if this is the first time you’re hearing about me dating women it’s because I don’t go around talking about my love life and generally in life my sexual orientation doesn’t come up. I mean who goes around asking, “So, what you into?”. And two, privacy. But if you ask me I’ll tell you, I fall in love with a person. I don’t see gender I see character, I see integrity, I see love, and I see who I am when I’m with them. I see who they are when they’re with me and I fall in love with a person’s spirit, not their body parts. Though, those are nice too.
FIRST LOVE
Corrine’s father, my first everything. We met in High School, I was 14 and nerdy, he was in my grade, popular and confident. He made me feel seen when I didn’t feel seen in the world at all. Your teenage years are difficult and we navigated those years together. Getting pregnant, getting married, and then getting divorced. I grew up with him but I had a lot of growing up to do.
What he taught me: how to love. At one point in life, we truly loved each other. He taught me a lot about control. Self control and that you can’t control someone else, you have power over yourself and that’s about it. I lost myself in him which was beautiful and terrible. Love is tricky always but especially tricky when you’re not emotionally mature. I’ll forever be grateful to you for Corrine. The very best of the both of us lives in her, thank you for that R.
Song that reminds me of him: Mariah Carey’s ‘When I Saw You’ came out when we met and I used to play it on repeat and dream about lunch time with him when we wouldn’t actually eat lunch but instead make out for 30 minutes near the cafeteria. Oh young ones.
Favorite memory: He’d drive me to school and we’d blast rap music so loudly (lots of Too Short and Baby Bash) that my ears would ring for the first half of the day and then we’d pass notes to each other during shop class. I still have the first note he ever wrote me. Next,
THE LOVER
my first real girlfriend. I started kissing girls in the 8th grade when I realized I liked them (way to go 12 year old me, live yo life), but this was different. She held my hand in public, she was a young mom like me, and I loved the way she handled herself, very composed. We’d listen to music together and dance around the living room when the kids were in bed and drink whiskey. Thank you for my love of whiskey and singing country music with me L.
What she taught me: Have fun outside of being a mom, it’s necessary. Make time for the relationships you want to last, relationships take effort and friendships are relationships.
Song that reminds me of her: Pink anything. We listened to Pink all day.
Favorite memory: Diner dates. We’d go to a diner and talk about life over coffee and waffles and whipped cream. Next,
THE MENTOR we met when ‘cruising’ was cool. He rode motorcycles and was detailed and intelligent. He took care of us in a time when I had nothing and was working two jobs to keep it together while everything was falling apart. He helped me get back on my feet and encouraged me to go to college. He taught me the true meaning of being independent. I traveled, went out with friends, and found my passions again because he gave me the freedom to. I’ll forever love motorcycles, fast cars, and my boobs, thank you G.
What he taught me: How to be aware of my surroundings, be a more defensive driver, P.O. Boxes forever, and to stand up for myself. He was in law enforcement so being paranoid in a good way was good. Still is. I always have an ‘out’ no matter where in public I go.
Song that reminds me of him: ‘Nobody’ by Keith Sweat
Favorite memory: late night motorcycle rides through the canyons. He’d wake me up in the middle of the night to hike me around windy roads with cool breezes and star chasing. Next,
THE NURSE
we met in college. She was in my 6am English class and wore a hoodie like nobody’s business. Her makeup was dark and in private moments she was sweet and laughed easily. She was driven. She wanted to be a nurse and the first in her family to get a degree. And she did it. I helped her get out of an abusive relationship and she helped me realize my love for taking care of and helping others. She was selfless and fiery. You always called me out on my shit and made me feel safe to talk about things that hurt, thank you for that M.
What she taught me: you must first be able to count on yourself before you can count on anyone else. Never break promises to yourself. That my intuition is always right. And that letting go is a good thing.
Song that reminds me of her: The Pussycat Dolls ‘Watcha Think About That’
Favorite memory: She’d walk me to my Psych class on Tuesdays and Thursdays before she had to go into work and we’d just stroll around campus with breakfast burritos and hot cheetos talking about everything and nothing. She always smelled amazing. Next,
THE WIFE
we met when I was married to my first husband. We were just friends then and remained friends after my divorce, always following one another’s lives and supporting each other. Our friendship turned into something more years later and I was in love with her in such a way, we even talked about marriage. She was smart, witty and SO funny! She was never embarrassed to show me affection in public and we remained friends after our breakup and still follow one another’s lives and support each other. You were my first real girlfriend long before you were my real girlfriend. Thank you G.
What she taught me: To be beautiful it just takes a genuine smile, some heart, and some silliness.
Song that reminds me of her: We listened to the 90’s a lot together, that whole era brings back great memories.
Favorite memory: one of the first memories I have with her was being in a car and feeling frazzled for some reason. I was still married then. She knelt down and looked at me in my eyes, she touched my arm in a serious but tender way and said, “it’s going to be okay, you’re strong and you have friends and I’m one of them.”
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So there it is. Do you like stories like this? Let me know in the comments <3 Revisiting each of the loves of my life through this short-not-so-short-story really allowed me to look at each of them with gratitude. So your turn, thank you Karissa for this! Here’s the template she gave me:
One word to sum up your significant other: A brief description of your relationship (focus on gratitude): Lessons you learned: Song that reminds you of them: Favorite memory:
I hope you do this, it’s so interesting to me what loves make up our past and present. They’re all so significant if you really think about it. And not from a negative space but to focus on gratitude as she suggests. I actually teared up writing this! Your turn!
I’m not sure what my current obsession with what everyone’s eating these days is all about, but it’s freaking me out. I genuinely am so curious about what everyone’s eating in a day, how much, what foods, how do they prepare it, what do they consider ‘clean’ eating? I hate the phrase ‘clean eating’ because it can be so confusing to me. Like 80 avocados and 17 bananas in a day, I wouldn’t do it, but to someone somewhere, THAT is clean eating and they don’t understand why they’re having digestive issues. Am I climbing the crazy tree alone here?
So I thought in the interest of keeping up with a trend that has piqued my interest, I’d share with you what I eat in a day. This is what I’m eating this week and the kind of meals I consumed last week as I’m in a Lacey Stone Fitness bootcamp, the last two week camp of the year and I’m all IN! You’ll notice I didn’t mention how many calories I have in a day because honestly it doesn’t matter. My caloric intake and my fitness goals are going to be different from everyone else’s so I thought I’d spare you the drama of explaining my daily breakdown of it all and just show you the food, when I’m eating it, and how I’m eating it…. the answer is with my fingers!
You’ll also notice I’m using My Fitness Pal (not spon, ha must disclose this just because) because I’m tired of ‘guesstimating’ what my eating habits are doing for me. How many calories am I consuming in a day? Where are my nutrients coming from? How many grams of protein, healthy fats, and complex carbs am I having? WHERE IS IT ALL COMING FROM?! I had no idea, so I downloaded the dang app and decided that for two weeks I’d track my meals and give myself a more accurate layout of what I’m doing that’s both good and bad for me.
I personally love meal prep because of the convenience. And the fact that it saves me time and money. We did the math and for us 6 ladies to meal prep 4 meals a day for 5 days, it cost us $79 each…for the week! Whoa, hey babyyy yes count me in! On days like yesterday and today where I’m cleaning the house or plowing through a day of work and to-do’s it really does help me to just heat the meal up and move on with my life. My hand is raised right now because I’ve become that person who sets an alarm to eat every 3 hours or so. Honestly, I do it because I forget, or I get too busy that I’ll munch on a snack aka a sugary treat and then by the end of the day I’ve gone the entire day without eating real food. So this helps!
So it goes down like this: after a fasted workout I’ll have my breakfast, then lunch, then a midday snack, then dinner. Four meals a day, either over 12 hours (8-8) or over the entire day depending on travel and my intermittent fasting streaks.
Breakfast: Egg white frittatas, fruit, coffee
Lunch: Lean protein, complex carb, healthy fat (this is every meal actually) and on this day I had a turkey burger with a Portabella mushroom open faced ‘bun’, some grilled veggies, salsa, and sweet potato fries
Midday snack: Veggies with hummus (I did zucchini, tomatoes, and cucumbers)
Dinner: Lentils with brown rice, hummus and a spinach salad (I used the spinach leaves like a tortilla and wrapped the hummus in the leaves like a lil baby taco!)
*Also featured as another meal option to have is another meal we prepped, bbq pulled chicken with grilled veggies, corn and black beans, with sweet potato cubes (they had cinnamon on them omgawww noms!) Also not featured, the healthy snacks I’ll munch on throughout the day if I’m ravenous and don’t want to eat my arm off.
And that’s what I had for the day. It may not sound exciting but honestly it was delicious and super nutritious, and I feel so energetic and good already just after this last week of eating this way. The bloat has gone away and I feel like my peppy self.
Have you meal prepped? Do you love it? Have recipes to share? Would you like the recipes for the meals I had today?
Morning routines: we all have one, or SEVEN depending on the day. Days that I’m not doing a work out or going for a run (ha, a run!) I consider my rest days because I’m in this stage of my life where I’m either working out or resting…say hello to my 30’s, work vs rest. So on this particular day of ‘resting’ where I’m editing videos and blogging from my couch in my pj’s from the night before, I wanted to share with you what this kind of morning routine looks like.
I picked up my camera, just moments after putting in contacts, brushing my teeth, and tidying up the place to showcase all of the different things I’ve been implementing into my daily morning routine. And when I say I casually picked up the camera to film a candid ‘morning routine’ with you, I mean c-a-n-d-i-d, girl is looking rough! Honestly, it’s fine, some sleep in the eye and makeup from the night before isn’t new to anyone so love me tender.
As you’ll see, I’ve been intermittent fasting lately and 14 hours is my breaking point before I go all out hangry on a stranger so it ends there. And the first thing I try and break my fast with is a collagen drink or bulletproof coffee, depending on the day, then I do a workout or work, have my supplements, and go about my day. Here’e the goods I talked about in the video:
I’ll save this whole intermittent fasting topic and meal prep subject for another day. In the mean time, check these goodies out and if you’re looking for an awesome daily vitamin that you won’t have to fuss over, give Ritual Vitamins a try <3
What’s something that’s a part of our morning routine that has been a game changer? It’s vitamins for me!
If you asked my husband to assess the product situation happening on my vanity he’d tell you I’m borderline a hoarder LOL Between makeup and beauty products, I’m not ashamed to admit that my life’s become a Netflix series episode. Honestly, I think we all have, I mean there’s just SO many options out there!
I started this blog 4 years ago to share with you any tips, tricks, and advice that I myself would love to hear about. So today I’m sharing with you a brand I’ve been using for the past month, Beauty By Design, what makes them unique, and how their service will help you to slash the stash!
The way their service works is you send them a selfie and skin survey, then they connect you to a Licensed Esthetician (!) via text. She diagnoses your skin and sends you a ‘skinscription’ where listed is all of the ‘game-changer’ products that she suggests just for YOU- and you can choose what to purchase.
I purchased four products that I’ve implemented into my daily skincare routine and have genuinely noticed a difference in my skin’s texture and hydration level. The best part… I can now text her anytime for advice… pssst hey Hilary, I promise not to call you at 3am and heavy breathe lol
Enjoy this Get Ready With Me video featuring the 4 Beauty By Design products that I purchased <3
Try their service for yourself, I’d love to get your feedback, and PS they offer free shipping on all orders! Click HERE to shop the site and use my code JESSICALIZAMA20 to receive 20% off your order because friends don’t let friends product hoard. #slashthestash <—- I’m coining this term lol
What’s your skincare routine look like? Wouldn’t you love to just eliminate the guestimating of it all and have a professional help you out? Do ittttt <3
Your girl is back on the sharing of the monthly favorites because that’s love and what I love I hope you’ll love and you know what else I love is a good run on sentence <3
